Army of Praise

…the angel said to them, "Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. ¹¹Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord. This will be a sign to you: You will find a baby wrapped in cloths and lying in a manger."

Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God and saying, "Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."

~Luke 2:10-14

An army.  A multitude.   A great number.  What do these words call to mind?

I see endless seas of faces, rows of uniforms, numberless figures.  Countless individuals.

It struck me recently, for the first time, that at the heralding of our Lord’s birth, an army of angels could not help but burst into worship.  They literally filled the skies with their presence and song!  Suddenly a great company of the heavenly host appeared with the angel, praising God [Luke 2:13].

[For those more literally minded, I checked the actual definitions; military units are comprised of: Squad: 9-10 soldiers, Platoon: 20-40 soldiers, Company: 70-200 soldiers, Battalion: 300-1000 soldiers, Brigade: 3000-5000 soldiers, Division: 10000-15000 soldiers, Corps: 20000-100000 soldiers]

100,000. ~ An army.

Granted this is a human number.  Something we can quantify, something with which we can identify.  For perspective, I even had to take away from this value.  I have visited the Broncos’ stadium, said to hold upwards of 76,000; and for the purpose of this musing, I will use this quantification.  This is not, however a Biblically mandated, prescribed, nor described number.  It is merely a tool I am using to help me understand the magnitude of this passage. 

Can you picture 76,000 heavenly beings filling the sky with their radiant presence, their ethereal voices ~ all lifted in worship of the babe laying as willing, helpless sacrifice in a trough?  76,000 unable to stand idly by and watch as their king was born into human flesh.  76,00 bent on proclaiming His arrival on Earth.  76,000 desperate for mankind to see the gift they had been given.  76,000 pleading for us to recognize what they already knew.

The roar, the thunder, the magnitude of noise from such a number is palpable, infectious, deliberate.  These beings could not help but let the world know their king was amongst them.  They simply couldn’t help themselves.

What if we approached our worship with this kind of reverence?  If we couldn’t help but cry out to the world?  If we knew that we were joined by literally thousands of heavenly entities?  If every time we thought of Baby Jesus, His name was accompanied by the praise from a football-stadium of heavenly hosts.

Celestial beings couldn’t help but herald the arrival of their king into our world.  Let’s paint our faces, wear appropriate attire, dance and sing our hearts out for our King ~ Jesus, the Messiah!

Made for walking

Since God chose you to be the holy people he loves, you must clothe yourselves with tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience. Make allowance for each other’s faults, and forgive anyone who offends you. Remember, the Lord forgave you, so you must forgive others. Above all, clothe yourselves with love, which binds us all together in perfect harmony. And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful.

~ Colossians 3:12-15

Yes, I know what you’re thinking:  Jen is blogging about shoes?  Jen? I’ll be the first to admit that I wouldn’t know a pair of Manolo Blahnik’s if they hit me in the head [I had to google the brand, to be sure I had it correct.  Side note: $1,500 for shoes?!  Are you kidding me?].  In actuality, this installment is more about choice than footwear.  About growing up, putting on our big girl shoes, and walking out our faith.

After reading Colossians 3: 12-15, let me ask you: how quickly do you forgive?  How patient are you?  How humble?  Frankly, how evident are the fruits of the Spirit in your life?  (Oh don’t worry, I’ve been asking myself these very questions of late; and the answers weren’t what I was hoping.)  For a moment, let’s just agree that none of us posses these qualities to their fullest.  So how do we go about getting them?  In truth, this process is a journey, very like a mountain climb, with the love of our life waiting patiently at the top.

First, we have to recognize that we can not attain these on our own.  Only the Holy Spirit can bring this fruit into our lives.  Once we are indwelt (through belief in and a life surrendered to Jesus Christ), we receive the fullness of the power of the Holy Spirit; in that, we are able to be completely transformed and therefore exhibit these qualities.  Secondly, we have to draw closer to Christ; through prayer, reading Scripture, and worship.  And the closer we come to Him, the more we yearn for Him.  In gaining intimacy with Jesus, He calls us to finally surrender everything to Him.  Our desires, our pasts, our emotions…everything.

We each are being called to deeper intimacy with the Lover of our Souls.  And we each are faced with choices:

1. To heed this call and head up the mountain or stay exactly where we are – distant from Christ and His amazing love
2. How to make the journey

Assuming that we choose to embark upon the climb up the mountain, we have to decide how to clothe ourselves for this trek.  We can select worldly garments; emotions or behaviors that look like the rest of the world.  We can opt for comfortable clothes; mannerisms that are familiar, well-practiced.  Or we can choose attire that reflects our journey; sensible actions, though seemingly out of place, that help our climb, ferry us closer to our destination.

We have to recognize our choice in this process.  We are not called to feel humble, forgiven, or loving.  We are told to clothe ourselves with these attributes.  To purposefully select and then put on these behaviors.  Like going into our closet everyday, we don’t feel shoes on our feet.  We choose what to put on.  And we have to keep our mountain climb in mind when selecting our footwear.



Looking like the world:  These shoes make me feel good.  No, they aren’t comfortable and yes, they hurt my feet.  But, they make me feel like I look good.  They’re my “I want people to think I’m put together” shoes.  My “notice me” shoes.

Pride.  Anger.  Bitterness.  These are emotions the world expects, and to an extent admires when we wear them.  When wronged, it makes sense to seek vengeance, to exult our selfish agendas over other’s needs.  To put ourselves first.

But these are utterly ridiculous for climbing a mountain. Wearing them guarantees a fall, and a potentially debilitating injury.  I will be sitting on the side of the trail, not making any progress towards to the top, nursing wounds brought on by wearing these foolish shoes on a serious hike.

These emotions do more harm to me than not.  They may look good, in the world’s eyes; but they are slowly crippling me.



Comfortable shoes: These shoes reflect familiar patterns.  The ones we’ve been practicing for years.  Our behavioral habits that say, “I’m comfortable here.”  Doubt.  Insecurity.  Striving.  I know these; they’re well-worn, molded to my foot after years of wear.  At the end of the day, it’s so much easier to put these on.  When I’m tired, when I let my guard down.  When I am weak.  I turn to these out of habit.  They certainly don’t compliment any outfit I own.  I look silly wearing them in public.

And again, they are ridiculous for climbing a mountain.  Wearing these, every little rock or thorn will pierce my skin through the soles.  They will gather and hold brambles.  I could, possibly make it to the top of the mountain wearing these.  But it will take far too long.  I will be in constant pain; and I will despise the journey.  Most likely I won’t make it far.  I will be forced, by injury (whether minor or more serious) to abandon my climb.  To be stagnant.  And lonely.



Hiking boots: They really don’t go with much; they don’t attract attention of people around me.  I don’t put them on at the end of the day seeking comfort.  But in heading up the mountain, these are the shoes that will protect me from rocks, from hurting my ankles. They will give me traction and help speed me along my climb.  I won’t arrive at the top with blisters, or thorns hanging off the sides.  In these, I will see the vista promised me.

Forgiveness.  Love.  Humility.  Certainly not behaviors the world admires.  Each takes work; they aren’t as easy or familiar as our current habits.  And yet, choosing to clothe ourselves with these will bring us into a more intimate relationship with our Lord.

It’s our choice.  We must clothe ourselves appropriately.

To emulate a king

If a small thing has the power to make you angry, does that not indicate something about your size? -Sydney J. Harris

I’ll admit it: I have an anger problem.  No, seriously.  Ask my husband.  It doesn’t take much to get my hackles raised, my claws out, and my teeth barred.  Some days, all it takes is me getting out of bed.  I have recognized this propensity in me for years; but, the closer I come to Christ, the more I find myself trying to overcome my weakness.  Anger hardly becomes a child of God.  Mercy, patience, gentleness, tender-hearted mercy; these are the fruits of a life lived with Christ.

I could use the Christianese phrase, “God’s not finished with me yet.”  Its cliché because it’s true; He’s not finished with me.  But that type of remark smacks of my generation’s amazing ability to duck responsibility.  [Did you catch that it’s my generation’s ability, not something of which I claim ownership?  Yeah, it’s rooted pretty deep.]  At some point, I have to stand up and say, “This is mine.  This anger is mine; and while I can’t handle it on my own, I need to start making choices that reflect my heritage ~ my heavenly kinship with the King of kings."  I need to start behaving as one who is a citizen of heaven.

But, HOW?

By first recognizing that I have a choice.  Not in the sense that I can control how I feel, but in that I can choose what I do with those feelings.  Secondly, I have to surrender everything.   Everything.  Things that are said to me, things that hurt me, things that happen within and outside of my control, things that rouse my anger.  Everything.

To illustrate this point, God preserved the story of King Hezekiah [2 Kings 19:9-37] for us to emulate.  (A very quick run down:) Hezekiah was king of Judah and was being threatened with invasion and destruction by Sennacherib, the king of Assyria, who had already conquered many other nations.  Sennacherib sent a messenger to Hezekiah insulting God, the Lord's sovereignty, and the beliefs of the Israelite nation [vv. 9-13].

The key to this passage is Hezekiah’s response; it is exactly what we are to do.  He didn’t kill the messenger, rouse the troops, and head out to battle.  Instead, Hezekiah physically took the paper on which Sennacherib’s threats were written and spread it out on the altar of the Lord [vv. 15-19].  Hezekiah praised God, who he knew was sovereign; and then he asked God to hear and see the insults of Sennacherib.  Hezekiah took everything that surely angered him (can you see him, shaking with rage at the audacity of the words written by his enemy?) and laid it out before the Lord.  Hezekiah turned his wrath into worship.  He surrendered, choosing to not act out in anger; instead Hezekiah chose to trust God with his emotions and the outcome.  [Which God did in vv. 35-37, without any further involvement from Hezekiah.]

So from Hezekiah, we can glean practical application ~ every time our anger is roused, whether righteously or not, we need to take it to the Lord.  Literally lay it before Him and ask Him to deal with it; deal with our emotions, deal with the situation, deal with us.  In this surrender, we find release.  Like Hezekiah, we can turn our wrath into worship.

All it takes is surrender.

He who angers you conquers you. - Elizabeth Kenny

Hath not himself

“The angry man hath not himself.” - Joseph Hall

Wrath.

Of the alleged, deadly seven, it is the most justifiable, is it not?  To seek out retribution for what has been lost.  To make the guilty pay.

How delightful to lick our chops at the thought of giving someone what’s coming to them; even in the smallest circumstance, a slight affront in conversation.  We roll possible scenarios over in our minds, letting sharp words and barbed truths hurl themselves at our aggressor, from out our mouths.  Putting the villain in their place once and for all.

Hardly Christ-like, though, is it?  Don’t misunderstand; Christ did get angry.  So angry that He over-turned tables, threw benches (Matthew 21:11-13, Mark 11:14-16, John 2:14-16).  He roundly rebuked those in need of it, His own disciples were not immune to His scolding (Matthew 16:22-24, Mark 8:32-34).  However, Christ never exhibited purposeful plotting of revenge.  He certainly warned people about the consequences of continuing in their present sin; He most assuredly told them where their path would lead them.  But He did not plan retribution; He sought reconciliation.  He wept for their eventual outcome.  His heart broke for their deceived states; and He carried the weight of their choices to the cross and to His grave.  Yet in His resurrection, even the most seasoned sinner has hope.

If Christ did not seek retribution, how then can we, as fallen, pitiful sinners?

Are we to ignore anger?  Pretend it doesn’t exist, that it is a part of this life to which Christ-followers are immune?  Is there truth in that?  Of course not.  In fact, Scripture tells us to “Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger” (Ephesians 4:26 NIV, emphasis mine).   Be angry.  That’s a command, second person imperative (e.g. the “you” preceding this sentence is implied).

So, according to this verse, I am to be angry for only a day, just so long as I’m not angry when I go to bed?  That’s the God honoring way to deal with anger?  Hardly.

The words “angry” and “anger” are two different words in the original Greek rendering.  The first “angry” is orgizesthe, meaning “to provoke, to make angry.”  This word is used in the passive voice, indicating that the action which causes anger is occurring outside of your person; it is happening to you, not caused by you.  The second “anger” is parorgismō, meaning “irritation or wrath.”  This is an internal entity, a noun in your possession, something you create or control.

Therefore, this Scripture is allowing me to feel anger, to become angry at something that happens outside of my control.  However, I am sinning if I allow myself to harbor anger, keeping it in my heart.  As Christ said, “what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart, and this defiles a person. For out of the heart come evil thoughts, murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false witness, slander.  These are what defile a person” (Matthew 15:18-20, ESV).

An example of this would be if someone were to wrongly insult my character.  Knowing that my character is being slandered, I am told by Scripture that I am to become angry at this affront.  However, mentally blasting the person responsible for this wound is a sin; to replay scenario after scenario over in my mind, point out all their faults, their “plank-eye” characteristics, is not Christ-like.

It’s holding anger in my heart that’s erroneous.  Making up the guest bed and letting it move in, that’s where the danger lies.  Because all too quickly anger rots, metamorphosing into bitterness.  Bitterness becomes the poison that taints everything else.  It is a poison which slowly kills joy.  And where bitterness is rooted in the heart, the enemy has permission to move in.  When we allow anger to fester, to feed bitterness, we hand the enemy property rights to a piece of our heart.  And where he is allowed to camp, he will defile.

So what do we do with the anger that we are told by Scripture to experience (Ephesians 4:26)?  Hand it over to the Lord; surrender it immediately, lest you surrender part of your heart to the enemy’s desires.

Greek transliterations and definitions taken from www.Biblos.com and www.e-sword.net.

Triple-braided cord

Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed.  If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.  Likewise, two people lying close together can keep each other warm. But how can one be warm alone?  A person standing alone can be attacked and defeated, but two can stand back-to-back and conquer. Three are even better, for a triple-braided cord is not easily broken.

~ Ecclesiastes 4:9-12




I have been increasingly interested in fostering genuine, honest, and transparent relationships with the people around me.  It is in this type of relationship, one is free to be his/herself.  To be loved regardless of your mistakes or slip-ups, to be loved through them.  To come out on the other side even stronger because your friends have pointed you toward the Lord, and you have grown because of it.  Knowing that what they said (in love) needed to be heard.  Knowing that when your friends have held you accountable to behavior modeled in Scripture, it is because they love you.

But they can’t hold you to that standard unless you let them in, into the dark places you don’t want to admit exist within your heart.  Unless you are willing to share with them your shortcomings and aspirations.

And when you are able to do just that, a community begins to form.  One borne of time spent together, transparent friendship, and shared experiences.  This community is not easily established; but once it is, it is not easily shaken.

So, I encourage you to ask these questions of yourself:

• Do you have this type of community?  At least one relationship like that?


• If you do, are you being open with the other parties involved?  Are they able to be vulnerable with you?  What would it take for you to foster this in your current relationships?


• If you don’t, what’s preventing you from seeking out this type of community/relationship?

If you have some relationships that you would like to grow into this way, start asking and answering questions to further this process.  Ask for their stories, and share yours.  Ask about their fears and aspirations.  Ask about things in their lives that continually challenge them; share what most often trips you up.  One of my favorites is “what has the Lord shown you recently?”

This relationship will not flourish overnight.   But when it flowers, it is more than worth it.

Who are we?

We have been given a crown of beauty for ashes, a joyous blessing instead of mourning, festive praise instead of dispair.  Through the righteousness of Christ, we are like great oaks that the Lord has planted for His own glory! ~ Isaiah 61:3

I was recently asked to share my story at a reunion celebration for Surrendering the Secret, as a token representation of where each of us has been and from what we have come through. However, in asking the Lord what to say, He reminded me that my story is not about what I've been through or work I have done, nor the works of others helping me heal this pain from my past. Instead, my story is one of many; each one meant to glorify the name of the Lord. Every redemption a praise offering to Him for healing this wound in His bride.

I am humbled to be able to be amongst those who know the tremendous blessing it is for each fo us to hear our redeemer's voice through Surrendering the Secret. This sisterhood is comprise of women from our early 20's to late 60's. We are your pew mates, your friends, your daughters, your ministry leaders, your pastor's wives, your Bible study teachers, your sisters. We come from strong Christian upbringings and non-believing homes. We have experienced abortion as long ago as 30 years, or as recently as 2 days prior to finding our Surrendering group.

• One out of every 4 pregnancies conceived in the United States is terminated through abortion (about 1.2 million per year).


• In more than 14 metropolitan areas, abortions outnumber live births.


• More than 30 million abortions have occurred since 1973.


• Approximately 45% of women seeking abortion today have had at least one prior abortion.*

We each have hidden from our pain using drugs or alcohol, relationships, eating disorders, perfectionism, our earthly children, careers, image manipulation, our church persona, even service to our Lord. Yet for all that hiding, we felt separated, distant from God. Alone. Like we were the only one not able to look our Heavenly Father completely in His eyes.

• 
  
  92% of women who've had abortions experience emotional deadening


• 
  
  86% experience anger or rage


• 
  
  86% fear others finding out


• 
  
  82% experience intense feelings of loneliness or isolation


• 
  
  63% experience denial


• 
  
  58% battle nightmares


• 
  
  56% develop suicidal feelings


• 
  
  53% engage in drug abuse


• 
  
  39% have eating disorders**

Until whatever initially drew our attention to Surrendering the Secretunsettled something inside of us, so that our spirits would no be quiet.  Because in our hearts, places we might not have even admitted to ourselves, we knew God had something to say about our past abortions.  So we make that phone call, get into a group, and then some of us try desperately to get out of said group.  Eventually, we make it through the doors, wearing our masks of "I'm fine;" but underneath we are broken, frightened, and ashamed.  We spend time in God's Word, the only thing that will set us on the path to His healing.  As the weeks progress, we peel off layer after layer of the shame we endured, the lies we've believed, the anger we buried, and the pain we cling to.  We surrender all of our secret to Christ, until we kneel at the foot of the cross, ready to finally trade our past for the promise of His future.

And then, what initially brought us to this group is no longer what defines us; nor does it bind us in sisterhood now.  We are now defined, along with every believer, as a beloved child of God through Jesus Christ ~ a holy people redeemed by the Lord for His glory (Isaiah 62:12).

*http://www.awpm.net/abortion_facts.php

**Layton, Pat.  Surrendering the Secret: Healing the Heartbreak of Abortion. Lifeway Press, 2008. pg. 45

I will

“’As a shepherd looks after his scattered flock when he is with them, so will I look after my sheep. I will rescue them from all the places where they were scattered on a day of clouds and darkness. I myself will tend my sheep and have them lie down,’ declares the Sovereign LORD. ‘I will search for the lost and bring back the strays. I will bind up the injured and strengthen the weak’”
Ezekiel 34:12, 15-16 [part]

I am a bit of an English nerd (thanks, Mom!). While I’m certainly not an expert, I do like my modifiers in the appropriate places. And, yes, I am constantly seeking metaphors. I read and then re-read sentences to gain meaning from their construction, their tone, their choice of words. I could literally spend hours on one or two well-turned phrases, extracting their full depth and enriching their meaning.

For example, the above Scripture is one of my favorites (yes, I do say that a lot ~ guess I really just love God’s word). At first glance it tells me that GOD Himself cares for me. HE says so, “I myself will tend my sheep;” and I’ve learned HE doesn’t flippantly say, or not say, anything (Ezk 34:15). This passage does not say, “I’m sending my angels in descending order to look after my sheep depending upon their righteous living. The martyrs warrant archangels, the prophets and missionaries get cherubim and seraphim, while the rest of you sinners can look out for yourselves.” No! The Sovereign LORD says, “I myself will tend my sheep.” GOD will personally search for the lost, retrieve those who wander, and heal the hurts of those wrecked by sin. GOD, who spoke the entire universe into existence, is personally looking after you; searching for you, calling you back, desiring to heal your wounds and strengthen you.

Amazing, isn’t it? You might have noticed that HE doesn’t just say that once. GOD says, “I will” five times. In case you didn’t catch it on the first read, HE reiterates that fact ~ in five separate instances. The Almighty GOD will personally tend to you.

The other part of this passage that I love is the use of the word, “will.” Notice the word is not “did;” GOD’s Son, Jesus Christ, did die for all the sins of the world ~ past tense. But the Creator of the Universe chose “will” to describe His relationship with us. This word shows futurity ~ it is going to happen. It denotes habitual action ~ something that is repeated again and again; then, now, & tomorrow. And it indicates an inevitable tendency ~ the action [or verb] following “will” is certain to take place.

The Sovereign LORD does not forgive us once & then abandon us to our soul-destructive tendencies. Instead, HE teaches us that it is HIS character, HIS very nature, to keep rescuing us, keep finding us, keep healing us. Even if HE has to take us back to the day of clouds and darkness to do so. And HE will continue to tend to us for all eternity. For we are HIS and HE is ours!